27 July 2009

"Oh, they're just that way"

Here's a strange Canadian phenomenon that needs discussing - Torontonianism. It's the strange affliction any native or former Torontonians have with their intense need and desire to frame the reference of ANY topic of conversation into such a way that Toronto is involved and whatever it is you're discussing happens more profoundly there.

The most recent example of this was on Saturday evening. The lightning storms were sweeping into the Lower Mainland. The conversation obviously went to the rarity of lightning storms on the West Coast, however the former Torontonian of the group had to pipe up how much more intense the storms are in Toronto. I had to channel all the power in me to bite my lip. First of all, this guy's been in Vancouver for 15 years -- give up the Torontonianism already! Secondly, has he ever seen Prairie storms before? Oh yeah, right, no. Toronto is the only place in the country that gets intense summer storms, I guess.

I think we need to start up a foundation that will help all these hapless Torontonians to break their addiction to Toronto. It's there and by christ it's awesome! We get it, okay?

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